Ok, Let's Deal With Adam

So, a little while ago I penned a post mainly for men looking to find their mate, and it's only fair that a mirror sequel follows. By public demand and all that.

I must confess that I'm a traditionalist when it comes to these things, and so I strongly believe it is the man's job to find, and the woman's to be, well, found. Still, if I had a daughter, I'd want to tell her things she can look out for that may help her in deciding whether that thief of a skinny boy is good for her. Needless to say, I'll have a couple of shotguns to help her along with the choice.

Read my other disclaimers in the earlier post. Those dealt with...

1. He's Poetic (Sort of)

Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh...you shall be called woman! Blame it on Adam, but since that day, women have expected to hear poetic lyricism from their men. Your man must be a man who likes to sing your praises, who extols your virtues whether he's with you or not. If he went ahead and spent a whole month trying to craft a poem to read you on your date, well in...

2. He works hard for you

Again, ask Jacob, that all-time standard setter for how long you should work for the girl you love. Mwanaume ni effort. You want a man that's making the effort in your relationship. A man who goes out of his way to find out that you like Indian tulips and scours the city for them just to make you happy. If he leaves all the initiating and all the work to you, and all he wants is to turn up and have fun, you have trouble on your hands.

3. He hears from God

This, to me, is the most critical element. He must hear from God. My wife showed me this recently - for some reason, in all my many years of reading the Bible, I had never seen this part of the story. When Mary was a virgin girl being used of God, she received angelic visits and God spoke to her directly. The minute she hooked up with Joseph, things changed, and Joseph was now the recipient of God's direction for their lives. Think about that. If you hook up with a guy who's not in step with God, it's gonna get sticky before long.

4. He's consistent

The C-word. It is almost as much shunned by men as that other C-word, Commitment. Consistent means constantly adhering to the same principles, course or form. It means holding firmly together. It's the word you use to describe well mixed dough - no lumps, no airy spots, same through and through.You want a man who's steady, not one thing today and another tomorrow. You want him consistent in his values, in his character, in his behavior, in his choices. You want him there, or deliberately taking steps to get there.

5. He honors you

Or I guess you could say he loves you. Or respects you. Or treats you well. They're all in there. If your man abuses you when he's angry, he won't change when you're married. If you're his wallet companion - meaning he only brings you out when necessary, and even then hides you, never talks about you in front of his friends or workmates - watch out. Not only should he be a man who celebrates you, he should your number one fan and defender.

6. He's like  you

This is the other critical one. He will have a huge say on how your future lives look - you better share the same values. Find out early, because you probably think you do (just because he's saved) until the day he clears all your savings to buy himself a Maserati. 

Feel free to add your own :)

Wondering Whether She Is (Or Could Be) The One?

I haven't been married long enough to write about marriage, but having at least dispensed with the business of finding, maybe I can say a thing or two about that. I'm also reading through Genesis again and it really is my favorite book for finding the answer to the how to know question, and the stories of Adam, Isaac and Jacob are so much fun, and so decidedly odd.

Now, this is not a complete or foolproof list, so don’t get hung up over what’s on it and what isn’t – it’s just a fun look at how these three men found their one, and I can't promise that this won't turn into a 13-part series. Also, perhaps it is important to say that I believe there's the one that God has for you, I believe that you find that person through a process, and it doesn't mean there's only one person you can get married to and woe unto you if she runs off to France with that husky-voiced, droopy-eyed no-gooder. Okay, here goes:

1. She's the only one in sight

Think Adam. There's no other girl, she's the only one who looks like you, and well, everything else around you is, um, weird. Adam could have gotten married to a hippo...how it worked is that there wasn’t anyone else suitable for him. Hence, Eve.

2. You woke up and suddenly...

Say you were Adam. You were asleep. Then you woke up, and you don't know what knocked you off your feet. Suddenly you saw someone whom you were willing to give your name, call flesh of your flesh, and write endless rhymes for. Good chance.

3. She's like you

This is a big one. The 'opposites attract' story is very modern. She came from you, so surely, she must be a bit like you. But on the inside, she absolutely has to be like you. It was so important that Abraham told his servant, you must go find my son a wife from among my own people. You must have the same values, believe the same things. You'll see how important that is when she wants to have a gothic mass and you want to take your kids to church.

4. You prayed, and God told you she was the one

This thing is no joke. Pray about it, like Abraham's servant did. Say all those great things he said. (And then of course you still have to go to the well and wait for the answer to the prayer, it's not like you're going to meet her in your closet :)). Be there when God answers. Also, since Pentecostal brothers have the tendency to overdo this and walk around telling girls God told me it's you...

5. You prayed, and God told her you're the one

If God only talked to you, um, a bit of a situation. See what happens in Genesis 24 - after the servant has told Rebekah his story, and then retold it to her family, when it came to crunch time, they say, we will call the young woman and ask her personally. They then proceeded to ask her whether she does indeed want to go get married to this mysterious man she's never met. But, you ask, what would have happened if she had said no while God had evidently answered this guy's prayer? Then, as Abraham had told his servant, you will be released from this oath.

6. She makes you want to, and actually do, impossible things

So Jacob turns up at some well, finds shepherds there. They explain to him that there's a huge rock that prevents them from getting water. He's rather disinterested. But see what happens when Rachel turns up: The moment Jacob spotted Rachel, ...he went and single-handedly rolled the stone from the mouth of the well and watered his uncle's sheep (Gen 29.10). You can almost see him strutting at Rachel's gratitude. If she can make you flip over yourself to go beyond your natural abilities just to get in her good books, good chance. Ditto Adam and his poetry.

7. You've worked hard for her

7 years. Maybe 14. Ask Jacob. Let her see that you value her, enough to sweat to get and keep her attentions. You know when you've worked for something, and when you've not. Value.

8. You married her

This here's the clincher. If you married her, she is THE ONE. It doesn't matter whether she was the one with pretty eyes (Leah had nice eyes) or the gorgeous one (But Rebekah was stunningly beautiful), if you married her, she's the one. Stop looking!

That'll be all.

Look Up

I’ve realized once more in the last few days how easy it can be to get caught up in the excitement of things going on around you. This is so especially if it’s the same thing everyone is concerned with. It’s easy to let passions run high, emotions fly, words spew forth without regard and generally forget anything else but the importance of your opinion.

But it’s not just elections that do that to us. Every day, we are faced with a myriad of cares that have incredible ability to absorb our full attention. Sometimes they’re small things and other times they’re significant things, but we spend a good amount of time trying to work things out and make things work the best way we know how. 

Inevitably, we end up with a ‘rat race’ of sorts, with a fire-fighting life composed of moving from one crisis – or one ‘event’ – to another, losing sight of the bigger picture we’re supposed to be living for God. It is perhaps this aspect of human nature that Christ was referring to in the parable of the Sower when he pointed out that ‘the thorny ground represents those who hear and accept the Good News, but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the cares of this life…”

The Bible paints pictures for us to help us figure out what to do to keep ourselves from getting absorbed in the cares of our daily lives, and the message is simply this – keep your eyes on Christ and what He’s about.

In one instance, Jesus was taking a nap in the boat when the tempests hit. The disciples, most of them seasoned fishermen, turned instantly into a scared bunch, waking Jesus with the exclamation that they were about to die. When He did wake up and calm the storm, his rebuke was gentle but clear – why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith in me? While their fear and anxiety may have been justified in the heated moment, His concern was with the bigger picture, the fact that their reaction to the situation said something about the state of their hearts.

At another time, they went out by themselves and came back with glowing reports of how they had healed sick people, cast out demons and stuff like that. Jesus was curt – rejoice not that the demons listen to you, but that your name is written in the Book of Life. In other words, even in the ‘victory’ moments of life, we shouldn’t be carried away by the moment and forget to keep our eyes on Him and what it’s all about.

I love how Paul puts in Colossians 3:1-2 (MSG): “So if you’re serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, act like it. Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don’t shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of you. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ—that’s where the action is. See things from his perspective.”

 All Christ wants us to do is to ‘get’ Him, to get what He’s about and run with it. Easier said than done, of course. But every time you find yourself caught up in the cares, anxieties or passions at ground level in your life, take a moment, step back and look up. Ask yourself what is going on around Christ, tap into His perspective, and stay there. That, really, is where the action is. And His perspective will keep you from getting off tangent with the things around you.

A Resolution You Shouldn't Miss

“The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him.” 

As popular as this verse is in Christian circles, few people know that its origin has to do with the somewhat tragic story in 2 Chronicles 15 and 16, about Asa, king of Judah. The son of Abijah, Asa is one of the few post-David kings that have the introduction “…for he did what was pleasing in the sight of the Lord.” 

Like many of us do, Asa got into his new job with almost unparalleled zeal. He brought down the pagan altars, restored worship and commanded that the law of God be obeyed. He deposed his grandmother from being the queen mother because she was involved in idolatry. He repaired the altar of God, led his countrymen in swearing allegiance to the one and only God, prompting a national revival. As a result, Asa enjoyed a rather peaceful reign.

The Bible takes care though, to describe two wars during Asa’s lifetime that sum up the whole lesson from his life. The first, in the early years, was from Ethiopia. Asa, in realizing how outnumbered he was (about 1 to 2), cried out to God for help, saying, “Help us, O Lord our God, for we trust in you alone…” He won that war, leading him to even more worship and reverence for God.

The second war came about 35 years later. This time round, Asa, probably emboldened by years of ruling, chose a different route. He responded by taking silver and gold from the Temple and his palace, and sent these to the king of Aram, asking for a treaty. Ben-hadad heeded, and helped Asa attack, and defeat Israel. The war was won, but Asa’s relationship with God was irreparably destroyed.

But what was Asa’s undoing? The prophet’s rebuke after the war contains the answer: “Because you have put your trust in the king of Aram instead of in the Lord your God…” Asa had made the mistake we all have a chance to make over and over again in our walk with God – shifting out trust from the God of our salvation to our own means. Asa was angry at the prophet for saying this, but his heart was already hardened. In fact, four years later, Asa contracted a serious disease and “even when the disease became life-threatening, he did not seek the Lord’s help but sought help only from his physicians.” And so he died.

It seems incredible that such a young king, who began with so much promise, would die off so easily. But it shows us just how serious God is when it comes to trusting only in Him. The minute we begin to put stock in our own abilities, or in the abilities of our ‘rich uncle’ or in whatever else we think is the source of help, we are sliding towards death.

A few years later, the prophet Jeremiah would echo this lesson: “This is what the Lord says, “Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans and turn their hearts away from the Lord. They are like stunted shrubs in the desert with no hope for the future…But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted by the riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water.”

Since the world didn’t end in December as rumored, another ‘resolution season’ is here. I pray that we would make trusting God our top resolution this New Year!

Moving Forward

I have no idea where the days went! One moment I was happily mapping out 2011 and the next I was wondering why I didn’t get the time to do all the wonderful things I’d planned for the year! It seems that once again life, and time, has had the best of me, and I’ve spent this last week debating between trying to salvage the year or let it go and plan for the next, again.

I suspect I’m not alone in this dilemma, and I know that for many of us, this can be a mighty depressing time of the year, since being human as we are, our tendency is to chronicle our failures and use them to color our conclusions as to whether this past year was a success or not. Whether there are written resolutions or not, the sense of ‘failure’ at some unachieved desire or things one just never got round to, weakened and failed relationships or prayers seemingly unanswered can seem rather overwhelming.

Ultimately though, we all have a choice when it comes to how we finish the year and enter into the next. We can choose to do it mopping around at our shortcomings or in thanksgiving at the things that did go well. We can move into the New Year looking behind or resolve to firmly look ahead without fear.

One of Paul’s most famous verses of Scripture is found in the third chapter of Philippians. In that chapter, Paul points out the folly of trusting in the flesh, noting that though he used to, he has come to a place where he has set aside that ‘legalistic righteousness’ for something higher. Then he says “…I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead…”

Paul knew what it meant to have missed the mark in human understanding. He also knew the fallacy, and danger, of camping in that un-attainment. So he provides what in my opinion is a practical and quite useful tool for continued success: forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead. As children of God, we must always be looking ahead, with the realization that our goal is eternity. Our perceived (and sometimes real) failures should never stop us from continuing to strive for the things that God has for us.

Thankfully, one of the benefits of being a believer is the truth of redemption. God is not bound by the dictates of the calendar and His redemption spans lifetimes, even His redemption of time. What this means for us is that we can always trust Him with tomorrow, and we can trust Him to get us where we need to go, as long as we will keep ‘straining towards what is ahead.’

So this time round I’ve done a couple of things – I’ve written out a lengthy list of all the great things that God has done, the goals I’ve seen accomplished, and am spending time thanking Him about them. What about the other list, the one with the undone(s)? I simply edited and re-titled it afresh, believing again for this New Year. I’m moving forward.

I quite agree with the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson on this subject: “Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities have crept in. Forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high spirits to be encumbered by your old nonsense!”

When Kings Stay At Home

It wasn’t that he was a lustful man. Really, it was a very bad time. He was tired, the battle had taken quite a toll on him, and things just followed in rapid succession. Plus, she was really beautiful. Thinking about it later, he realized something else he hadn’t paid much attention to – all of his peers were away, still fighting his war. They understood he needed his rest, even if for a moment, and hadn’t disturbed him when they left to go back to the battlefield.

So here he was, walking on his roof, and there she was, swimming naked in the compound next door. One thing led to another and by the time he was done, he had killed his friend, her husband, to hide his indiscretion. David had fought and won many battles, but this afternoon was his waterloo.

I’ve often wondered what went through David’s mind on realizing the weight of his sin. I wonder what discussions went on between him and his Lord as he pleaded for the life of the child Bathsheba carried from their union. Did he blame her for tempting him with her foray into the pool? Did he rant at God for allowing him to see her? Was it the circumstances of his weariness and the weight of battle that he pointed fingers at? Or was he angry at Uriah for having built his house so close to the palace?

In all likelihood, all of these thoughts went through David’s mind and more still. We all know the ‘morning after’ feeling, the realization that in giving in to an impulse, you had made an irreversible mistake. And as often happens to us, I suspect the things that David kept beating himself up about over and over again was not his weakness, but his being where he was at that particular time.

David’s whole army was out fighting, a war that he should have been leading. In fact, the chapter begins thus: in the spring, at the time when kings go off to war…David sent Joab out. But David remained in Jerusalem. It was the season for war, it was the season for people to be out conquering territory for the nation of Israel, God’s chosen people. But the king opted to remain at home. What followed was not a disaster for the army (they won), but for the king.

And what a powerful truth it gives us - whenever kings stay at home, trouble surely and swiftly follows them.
This is the truth I’ve found – the enemy likes to find the kings in God’s army, and give them reasons to stay at home. Away from the war, in a place of ease and comfort. In that place, he finds temptation to present to them. With the laziness of peace having crept in, few of us are awake to his devices, and like David, we rarely make it. He likes to make sure that we have ‘things’ to do on our own, away from the family of God, and when he attacks, we are by ourselves and unable to stand.

Kings were not born to stay at home while the army is out fighting. These are times of war. Man of God, don’t stay at home. Don’t be at ease in Zion. If all you do is stroll on your rooftop every eve, soon enough there will be someone for you to sleep with. If your armor sees no war, it will soon be rusty and useless to you, your people and your God.

Kings were not born to stay at home.

The Restoration Guy

This past weekend was a bony one for me. On Saturday, I had the privilege of visiting a group of young men in Kibera who are using bones to make all sorts of expensive things, mostly decorative. Over 100 dollars later, my friends and I left there very much impressed and with bags of ‘evidence’ – evidence that bones are not an ‘end’.

Then come Sunday and my pastor decided to preach on the very same matter – bones. He spoke of how in one historic and much talked about event, Ezekiel spoke tones of them back to life. The Scripture where the story is told reads like a scene from a movie: as it starts, “old and dry bones (bleached thoroughly by the sun) covered the valley floor, scattered everywhere”; and when it ends, “they all came to life and stood up on their feet – a great army of them!” I love this story!

These two incidents have something, or shall I say someone, in common – an individual who dared to believe that more could be made of the bones, that they could do more than just sit there, dead. Yet neither at the factory nor in the valley did the bones just transform to something living and of value on their own. There had to be someone taking them through a process. For the boys in Kibera, it’s a dirty, dusty and smelly process of grinding, cutting and shaping; For Ezekiel, it was applying the words of prophecy that God gave him. The end result was the same – something new, useful, of value and life.

I wonder if these young men realize how much they represent the character of God Himself. Just like them, God is in the business of restoration. In fact, I think that’s probably the largest department in heaven. Putting people back together, giving life to dry, dead bones, over and over again. Taking things that seem useless and written off, charred beyond repair and making them glorious. Taking people that have been battered by life and fellows, and giving them a fresh breath.

Zechariah 3 has an interesting story of Satan accusing a dirty-clad priest who had obviously been through the rougher patches of his walk with God. Yet listen to what God says in Jeshua’s defence: This man is like a burning stick that has been snatched from a fire…and He goes ahead to restore Jeshua, clothing him with new fine robes, giving him new authority and calling him “a symbol of the good things to come.”

The genealogy of Jesus himself is like a soap opera – it’s filled with murderers, prostitutes, adulterers, all kinds of people. Yet God did not hide them or their faults, He chose to restore them instead, and use their very bloodlines to attach the Savior to. He chose to show us that He can take dead bones, cast off lives and use them for His glory. What hope there is in the restoring hands of the Master!

I’m encouraged today, that it doesn’t matter how much you think any part of your life is dead and useless and irreparable, if you will take the step to speak the Word of God to it, you can trust God to bring back life. You can trust Him to put in new flesh to your walk with Him, to clothe you with new raiment if that’s what you need, douse the charred edges and make things whole again, snatch you out of the fire and darkness into His glorious light.

God is in the business of restoration, and He can restore anything!

Shall We Do?

I had a rather rare privilege this past Saturday evening at a Gentleman's Dinner (that, for the uninitiated, is what maybe you would call a bachelor's party, we just roll like that!). I had close to three hours of listening to married men talk about their marriage experience - 33 years, 28 years, 8 years, 2 years, even 24 weeks! And what a wealth it was!

It was so refreshing listening to men who are still madly in love with their wives decades later, seeing men who have gone and done it, have learned to live with their wives, have learned forgiveness and love and making it work, and are enjoying every bit of it. It was amazing to hear a father talk to his son and encourage him to begin the walk of marriage with confidence - not glazing over the bumps that can be found in it, but giving proven tips on how to work through them.

There's nothing that has been dragged in the mud so much over the past few years like marriage has. It has been painted as an impossible thing to do, a misguided idea, a relic on its way out. All sorts of reasons have been thrown up as to why it can't be done, or if it can, why it's no longer viable to say 'till death.' Throw in mixed tribes or mixed races and you're in even bigger trouble, and another litany of 'why nots.'

But for those hours, the men who have gone before us dispelled the myths, encouraged and exhorted us, and near pleaded for us to restore the family and marriage as God intended. They made us laugh, they made us think, they made us hope. Yes, it's possible, even in this day and age, to have a Godly, solid and exciting marriage, to live in the fullness of what God intended for the family unit. It's work, AND it's possible.

To Mr. Mangucia, Mr. Malu, Gilles Mukusa, Kevin Malu, Albert Sabwa, thank you. Thank you for showing the way. To Tray Murundu and Lydia Stern, to Sammy Baita and Anna Marie, Godspeed as you begin the most exciting journey of your lives in just a few days. We're watching in the wings excited for you and urging you on. Yes, marriage will be everything you have hoped it will be, and more!

Stick With It! - An Ode To Grace

I’m born-again, I’m a new creation. I have a past, an old nature. It was nailed with Christ to the Cross, but sometimes I think it resurrected with Him as well. I am constantly amazed at my propensity towards and affinity for sin, despite my claims to the heritage of heaven. Isn’t it interesting how ‘the wrong thing’ is always so incurably attractive?

As a Christian, I’m called to live righteous. Yet sometimes, it seems that the effort it takes to do so is just not available, at least when it’s needed. The line of men who found that out is long, but two come to mind; David, looking back regretfully at a poor ‘one evening’ decision, and subsequently penning countless psalms bemoaning the fact; and Paul, crying out in anguish at the folly of his choices, saying, ‘the things I want to and know I should do, I don’t; yet the things I don’t want to and know I shouldn’t, I most certainly do!’

I identify with these men on many levels. As a result, I can’t help but ask myself, what is it, really, that God wants from us? When He created us, did He not know, like David said, that we are but clay? Does my every now and then weakness surprise Him? Does He sit in heaven, regretting ever having ‘saved’ me? And right there, that’s where the truth comes in. I am saved.

When Jesus died on the Cross, He saved me – from my past, my present and future sins and failings – He bore all of them. Long before I knew Him and long before I knew how much I would need saving, He paid the price for my redemption. That is the truth. There is another truth - God asks some things of me to keep this relationship going. For one, I must continually work out my salvation with fear and trembling, and when I fall, I must look back up to God and seek His forgiveness and restoration. I must live in the light as a true child of the Light, called of God, and I must remember that all my decisions have consequences – of life, or death.

But most of all, and above all else, God wants me to remember that I am not saved by works, nor by my strength. It is only by His grace that I am saved. The most important of these truths is that His salvation is based on the sacrifice the Lord Jesus made, and my acceptance of that gift. Not on my frailties or abilities. I see it everywhere in Scripture – a Father who asks that we never stop, never give up following Him.

David, He ended up describing as a man after His own heart and the greatest of kings. Paul, He went ahead and used to turn the world upside down and write huge swathes of the New Testament. Men who let their desire for God override and eventually erode their struggle with the old nature – those are the men God used.

Found yourself in struggles of late? Things that you think you should be over but are just not letting you be? Feeling like your one step forward is matched by seven backwards? Be assured that your Father in Heaven is keeping a firm grip on you – as long as you will do your part in staying in the process of seeking after Him and His heart. To quote Jesus, to Peter: I have prayed for you, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.”

Deeper...Still

I love swimming. Now, I need to mention that for the statement to be entirely true, we’d need to have a long discussion on what ‘swimming’ is, and I suspect you would not agree with me on whether I even know how to swim. Nevertheless, I consider the definition of the word to be broad enough to include sitting in the pool (on shallow end, of course) with the water up to my neck and holding on tightly to the bars. Oh, bliss!

I get very excited about going to the pool – that’s how I know about the love part. And, I always vow before I leave the house that ‘today’, I will swim the entire length. In that particular dream, I’m beautifully and coolly doing my strokes across the pool and all the fairer members of the crowd are standing around gaping and clapping. Needless to say, it’s taking time for that to become a reality.
 

Mind you, I was once quite the fish - sharks have complained about my making them look bad in inter-coral competitions. Then one December evening, in the Tanzanian part of the Indian Ocean, a near-drowning experience abruptly ended my affair with water bodies, and it took me some time to re-ignite it. So you can understand why my steps are tentative, and restricted abut to the edge. I keep telling myself that this time round, I’ll venture out into the deeper parts, but I’m yet to get round to it. Perhaps this year…

I wonder how many of us are like that. Not in the natural swimming pool, but in the one that actually matters – the expansive rivers of God. Oh, we love God, there’s no doubt about that. We get very excited about ‘being’ with Him. And yet, when it’s time to make a commitment, pay a price to make that happen, we’re happy to stay in the shallow end, holding tightly to the ledge. Getting into the depths of God requires work – work that we either don’t have time for, or don’t consider essential, or that we’ve tried before and gave up.

Yet that was never God’s plan! His desire is that we would get as deep into Him as we can, as near to Him as is humanly possible, and then closer still with the help of the Holy Spirit. Paul says, in his letter to the Corinthians, that (paraphrased) No one’s ever seen or heard anything like this, never so much as imagined…what God has arranged for those that love Him…but you’ve seen it and heard it because God by His Spirit has brought it all out into the open before you. The Spirit, not content to flit around on the surface, dives into the depths of God, and brings out what God planned all along.

That stirs something in me. God wants me to dive with His Spirit into the depths and discover Him. The shallower our relationship is, the less I can expect to receive from Him. He gets excited about people that will go after Him – in fact, He gets so excited He begins to reveal His unfathomable self to the seeker. And it is there, in the depths of God, that life in all its fullness is found. It is there that the plan of God for our life with Him is brought out into the open.

I’m giving it a decided go, this diving into the depths of God. As for the other matter, I’m still trying to fix a lunch meeting with one of them Dunfords – let’s see how it goes.

Another 365 Days!

The passage of time is always an interesting thing to study. It’s amazing how quickly the seasons change, how tomorrow can make such a difference, how yesterday can seem so long ago. Starting a new year is nothing more than a calendar jump really, but it’s still a daunting undertaking. Yet another 12 months to live, and who knows what may be in them?

When you’ve had a tumultuous year like the one I’ve had, it’s a leap that requires considerable faith. In looking back on 2010, I’ve often felt like the spider crawling up the water pipe - one moment it was bright and sunny, and the next moment, someone poured in water and life became a wet, spluttering and slippery mess. Not once. Not twice.

The wetness goes away, and the sun comes back up, without fail. Away from the spider and its troubles in the drain, life moves on unfettered. But it’s having the faith to start walking again that determines whether the spider lives or dies. And so it is for us too. Who is to say what the days hold? Who is to know whether the rain will start pouring again as soon as we make the first step?

Some people take the world-approved ‘strong’ route, building walls miles high to protect them from any errant spray of a shower. With each day that passes, their skins get thicker by experience, and we admire their ability to feel nothing, and nod our heads philosophically when they pronounce high sounding mantras on living a soul-less life.

Yet others prefer the difficult trail of faith and hope. They believe that no matter how wet the last minute was, the good Lord has sunshine up his sleeve for the next. Their hearts are open and their hurts many. They see eternity where only a moment exists, and believe the promises over circumstances. As soon as it’s sunny enough to walk, you’ll see them whistling along happily up the pipe they slid down last time.

It’s the path I choose to take, though it gets pretty rough. In all honesty, I’m just as unsure as the next guy. But there’s a difference between uncertainty and doubt. Uncertainty is a matter of comprehension; doubt is a matter of faith. I may not understand much, and I am certainly a bagful of questions, but I have no doubt that it shall all be revealed to me in time, and that God is firmly in control. Of the pipe, the weather and everything in between.

It would be great to quote something biblical at this point, like the story of how David’s longest episode in life was as a fugitive, or of Joseph’s as a prisoner, or of Abraham’s barren years. But there’s an example closer home – I am here today. It’s a testament to a true God, who carries his sheep on his shoulders when their legs are broken and they’d rather die than walk; who gently nurses them back to health, and teaches them how to run again, never mind previously disabled limbs.

It’s parts amusing and parts scary to think that HE has 365 days – again – to surprise me, to lead me to places I never thought I would go, to load me with gifts I didn’t ask for, to get me out of trouble I never even thought I’d get into in the first place, to be my father. Even with all the ‘experience’ I think I have, nothing beats that expectation, because I know that with every new day, ‘no eye has seen, no ear has heard…’

The Chinaman & Attendant Lessons

I’ll wager you one that if the Chinese upped and left today, we would have absolutely no idea what to do with the gazillion roads they’re in the process of constructing. Sometimes, when I find myself stuck in those China-induced jams (with a huge ‘we apologize for any inconvenience’ sign blocking my view), I try to figure it out. It’s a gargantuan headache.

They are a trying part, really, those jams. Add to that the dust and the crazy driving now enhanced by lack of space, and you have yourself a daily Beirut-like road experience. Somehow, when I saw those beautiful pictures of the “superhighway” with its crisscrossing lanes and beautiful flyovers and unreal grass, it didn’t quite conjure in my mind what Nairobi has now become.

I was thinking about all this recently, while being elbowed off the road by matatus, whose drivers of course care less about the fact that there’s no pedestrian strip on that side of University way. I realized that I simply don’t like process. I suppose none of us men do, but I have a particular apathy for the ones filled with pell-mell-confusion, unclear, misty at best-I much prefer things I can understand, and that are over in a hurry.

The Chinese say they’ll be done by 2015 (gasp!), and then we’ll see the full picture. Someone help me.

My life isn’t doing much better either. Half the time I can’t see through the cloud of dust, I don’t understand where which road is leading, and I wonder why the traffic only gets thicker. Other times, I question whether I’ve lost the way, whether my blueprints have been written in Mandarin and therefore no one can read them, and I wonder what would happen if I, figuratively speaking, jumped off the bus.

I’ll tell you something else that doesn’t help. My mind. Always in high gear, thinking, reasoning, drawing rational conclusions and working out simultaneous possibilities. Result? A rather frustrated process. I want to have all the answers, I want situations to make sense, I want my roads to be straight-forward, with signs at appropriate places and no potholes, thank you.

 But these Chinese and their superhighway, they’ve given me a lesson. At the beginning, they showed us a picture, an artist’s impression of our finished roads. I suppose they expect that anytime you’re driven to complain about how the process is going, or you’re puzzled by how the bypass is meandering, you’ll remember. Remember that they know what they’re doing, and somehow, we’ll get our beautiful roads in the end.

God too, He’s like the Chinaman. He shows us a picture of where we’re going, mostly just once, and often when we’re younger. Then He gets to work on getting us there. And when the journey gets frustrating, and things are not making sense, and boy, it looks like someone lost The Plan, He hopes that we will remember. Remember all that He said, the picture He has shown us of the end, the promise He has given. Think Abraham, on his way to sacrificing Isaac; think Joseph, in prison for years, wondering whether his dreams were just delusions of grandeur; think George…

Can’t speak for the Chinese, but God, He knows what He’s doing. And it ALL comes out beautifully in the end, just like He said it would, and in exact detail too. No matter how twisted, confused and impossible it may look at whatever point in the journey, every promise that He makes, He will accomplish, because He said it. He’s able. Remember, be sure of, and rest in that.

Fear Magnifies Fearsome Objects

My house is like a huge underground zoo – you know, the kind you saw on antz or a bug’s life. I share it with all sorts of living creatures, led by colonies of ants and their attendant uncles. In the last day alone, I’ve dispatched to their maker a flame-red cockroach, a rather obese safari ant, a cricket, grasshopper and some other flying creature I can’t find in the encyclopedia of crawling things. I suspect it’s punishment for my rather violent dislike for all things crawling.

But of all these visitors, the ones who are fronting a real challenge for residence are the ants. They come in their thousands and pop up out of every imaginable crevice. And, they don’t die. On the contrary, the more you sweep them away, the more they bring forth. I wonder what their newspapers look like – they must have about a million pages worth of obituaries every day. It is absolutely frustrating, yet I can’t help but admire their tenacity. Sometimes, I’m even tempted to let them be, and find a way for us to live together.

Like with the ants, the devil and I have come a long way. From the days when I didn’t even know he existed, to the days when I changed sides and the duels began. Thereafter, it’s been a see-saw. I sweep him out, he comes back in. Sometimes he disappears for a while, only to come back better suited, and with a battalion. Other times, when things get really bad and the insecticide isn’t working, I’m tempted to let him be. Then I remember that statement that I have been taught and come to learn, that what you allow you eventually accept.

So instead, I’ve become a student of the art of war. I have refused to be ignorant of his wily devices. Ants, by the way, use numbers to intimidate. The devil, he has quite an impressive arsenal. I’m unraveling it item by item. Someday, I’ll be pretty good at knowing how to knock out everything he can dish out. Recently though, I’ve been learning about the one he used to fell the Israelites and prevent them from getting into Canaan. It’s called discouragement.

My pastor recently commented that if the deceiver could only have one weapon, it would be discouragement. With most of us, he doesn’t have to do much to get us into a place of hopelessness at the tasks that lay before us – all he has to do is blow up a few things, exaggerate our vision of horror and we’re done for.

Those Israelite men, they decided that they were grasshoppers, and the giants who lived in the big city with walls up to the sky (sounds ridiculous, right?) would maul them. And that was it – we are told only Joshua and Caleb made it. I understand, because I’m the kind of guy who can talk himself into a bout of depressive fits at the smallest of molehills.

I’m also the guy who’s understood the lesson that discouragement is not just an emotion to get over, it’s the devil fighting to stop me from moving. So I’m buffeting my anti-discouragement shield, made of the words of God to me – fear not; be strong and of good courage. I’m taking my pastor’s advice and turning my tribulations into triumphs, failures into fortunes, setbacks into successes, obstacles into opportunities and my burdens into blessings.

As for the ants and bugs, I continue to sweep them out without fear or favor. A day cometh when they will be no more and I will have won!

Desperation

It’s a bad thing to be desperate. You come off as weak, dependent, couldn’t find another option. You are probably hopeless, and in your eyes, only the one you’re desperate for can help you. If he/she doesn’t, you’re done for. It’s a bad thing to be desperate.

Say, peradventure, that you’ve had a blood disease for twelve years. You’ve spent millions and many haranguing moments at the hands of doctors and relatives who call you cursed. You’ve been locked up in your house, and are condemned to solitary walks, because no one wants to get near you. What if then, on one warm afternoon, you hear shouts in the streets, and a rumor that a great man of healing is in the vicinity.

Do you see now, the need for the desperation? You lock your doors and gather your skirts, and run after the crowd. Of course, you know that it’s unlikely you’ll even get to the great man. But you have this wild notion in your mind, that maybe if you could just touch the hem of his clothing, you’ll be healed. It’s stupid yes, but desperation often is. You know that if they were to notice you and realize what disease you have, you’ll be stoned to death. But then again, you might just get there before they catch you, right?

So you press on, dart through the spaces in the swelling crowd. You can see the great man’s hair now, so you know you’re close. You press a bit further, and then with all the energy you have left, you reach out and touch the trails of his skirt. It’s blinding, the realization that the bleeding has stopped. But before you can soak it in, the crowd stops and turns in your direction. Oh no, someone recognized you, but how? Then you see the great man walk toward you and ask whether you touched him. There’s compassion in his eyes as you tearfully tremble and nod.

“Daughter”, Luke reports the great man as saying, “your faith has made you well, go in peace”. He might just as well have said, your desperation has made you well – He knew.

Or perhaps you’re a man thirty plus years of age. You live a sorry life, blind, the town’s street beggar. You once had dreams of great achievement, hopes for everyday and a future to come – that was before the blindness set in. Frantic runs to the doctors did not help, and you slunk back to accept your ‘curse’, a world of darkness, a demeaning life as a mendicant. Sitting on the street one day, you hear shouts of a crowd and ask what is happening. They tell you, and in a moment of desperation, you think, what if this is really who he says he is?

So you start shouting, Son of David, have mercy on me! The people in the crowd try to hush you; after all, you’re interrupting the great man. But your desperation has taken you past caring for their propriety, and you shout louder. And louder. It gets silent, and you can’t feel the crowd anymore, and you’re about to go back to your begging spot when you hear the voice of the great healer. What do you want? he’s asking. You plead that all you want is to see.

“All right”, the great man says. “You can see, your faith has healed you!” When your eyes open and you see him for the first time, you are met with eyes that saw your desperate soul.

There’s something about desperation. It causes God to stop.

Champion for Christ

Like most ‘pseudo-realistic’ urbanites, I tend to shy away from making New Year’s resolutions. At least the written down and shared with the world ones – alas, I’m not as much a child of discipline as I’d like to be. That notwithstanding, I do have an end of year ritual that I suppose none of us future-cautious people can resist – reviewing the past.

Part of the reason why December can turn out to be quite depressing, is that it’s the month to realize just how badly you faired during the year. All the things that you thought would be done that didn’t materialize, all the promises you couldn’t keep, the fact that you’re a year older with nothing much to show for it, and so forth.I was in review mode as I went to church on the last Sunday of the year, and thankfully, so was my pastor.

And he fed me quite a shift in perspective. He spoke of Joseph, the husband of Mary. Not much talked about, is he? All we know is that he was a carpenter that married the mother of Jesus. Often, we fail to consider what an extraordinary assignment he had – to bring up the child Jesus, protect him, keep him safe and straight, make sure he was going to church often, and basically be a father.

It’s so easy to write off Joseph as just another ordinary man who amount to much. Not true. Pastor’s point was that God has a specific assignment for each one of us, and you should never think yourself unworthy of God’s attention. But it was what he said as he wrapped up his message that really got me: (in paraphrase) you’re a champion for the cause of Christ; don’t minimize your assignment. Your daily obedience and faithfulness,…the fact that you can look back and say that you’ve followed Christ for another whole year…just that makes you a champion.

It’s amazing how in looking back over the year, our walk with Christ comes across as a series of struggles, battles, near-death escapades and if you’re an average young Christian in Nairobi, the devil seems to have had quite his share of victories. Yet check out what 1 Peter 1 says:

v6: so be truly glad! There is wonderful joy ahead, even though it is necessary for you to endure many trials for a while. These trials are only to test your faith, to show that it is strong and pure. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold-and your faith is more precious to God than mere gold. So if your faith remains strong after being tested by fiery trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.

My faith is that precious to God. Are you still standing in the faith after everything that tried to bring you down in 2009? You’re a great one! Did you continue to get up and follow Him every time you fell so bad you were sure you’d never recover? He has a banquet for you! Did you fight off pressures to quit and kept moving after Him even when it seemed hopeless? It’s not in vain! You’re a champion for the cause of Christ.

As for me, I’ve had a pretty good year, a victorious one even – I’m still saved, I love and am following Jesus and my faith in Him is sure. In fact, I’ve even gone ahead to make a resolution for 2010 – I’ll be a Champion for Christ one more year!

my Christ

I’m not very apt at brandishing theological profundities and convincing people to change their ways and follow the Christ I know. All I can share is that I know this Christ, the one who lives not only in the pages of the Holy Scriptures but in me. I know the Christ who is so intensely personal that I actually feel Him. I know the Christ of the Cross, the Christ of forgiveness, the Christ who literally shepherds me.

I desire greater passion, but conviction and evidence I have. I hold the conviction that were it not for Him, I would be a mess, a directionless one. I have the evidence that this is true, because I can point to what my life is about, and it would be Him I’m pointing to. I have the conviction that He personally knows me and cares for my affairs, that He has some plan for me that He keeps working out. My evidence lies in His words, in the things He does in my life, in the way He shapes my thinking, attitudes and steps.

I am sure that He’s the right way for me, because I see the ways the people that do not know Him take, and how it ends always in death, of one kind or another. Sometimes I’m not too sure about the details, but I am yet to get lost in following Him – I suspect I never will. I know the Christ who keeps His word – contrary to popular (mis) belief, His way is rather simple – follow me and I will show you the way of life.

My Christ has given me life (in abundance), the true meaning of life. I know some of us Christ people use Him as an excuse for poverty and laziness, but underneath is a truth – Christ first gives you life, blesses you royally and then gives you materially, as to your need or even more. Because by then, you’ve realized that it’s not as important as it’s made out to be. I’m a wealthy person because of Him – I have peace, I have joy, I have purpose, I have identity and I have a secure source.

Of all the trumpets I could blow about Christ (mind you, He doesn’t need any trumpeting), the loudest note would have to be the one about His unconditional love, saving grace and forgiveness. Oh, when I say I am redeemed, I do it with tears, because I know what I really was and what I have the capacity to be were it not for Christ. As Matthew West sang, I'm a man with big mistakes, big regrets and bigger breaks than I even care to confess/but you're the one that looks at me and sees what I was meant to be/where would I be without someone to save me/someone who won't let me fall…

It really is true – about my past and about my present. Also, about the Christ who saved me and won’t ever let me fall. He loves me through every season – the days I run away, the days I slink back in shame; the days I rave about Him, the days I couldn’t care less; the days I know where we’re going, the days I don’t want to go anywhere; the days things make sense, the days I feel like dropping into a bottomless hole. He just loves. And it breaks me, all the time.

My Christ has a firm handle on life and all the answers too. Give Him a try. I, for one, am a Christ-ian and mighty proud of Him.

I Like You. I Really DO.

I like you. I really do. I like the way you know me through and through, you’ve seen all my bad and my good and you’ve weighed it and decided it’s me you want. Oh, what a stubborn fool I can be. Sometimes I love you, sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I feel you, other times I couldn’t care less. I know the things you love, and I want to do them to make you happy, but they’re so hard, and easier ignored. I know the things you hate, and I try to avoid them to make you happy, but they’re so much easier to do.

I try hard, and I like that you help me and you never let me feel like I can’t make it. I like the way that you’re always whispering in my ears that you believe in me, and that you like what you see in our future. Oh, I want to make you happy, that’s my greatest desire. And not for no reason – it’s because I’ve never met anyone like you. Who loves so unconditionally? Who cares so much about what I am becoming rather than what I am now? It’s amazing the things you’ve done for me, even knowing my capacity to turn my back on you.

I worry about my world a lot, and how everyone has so many problems they can’t solve. I worry also, how everyone has so many answers, and so many things that they think will make them happy or make their problems go away.

So of all the things you’ve done for me, I like how you fulfill me. How with you I feel safe, never uneasy, never wondering whether things will turn out OK. I just know that they will, because when you speak to me, it’s like gentle cool rivulets flowing down my face on a hot afternoon. I like how you answer my every concern with that stillness. I like the hope you give me, how I get a spring in my step every time I come from spending time with you. I like the way you show me love and make me want nothing else. Oh, bliss!

And yet, I fear that I do not talk about you enough. So this here is a reminder, to myself and to everyone that ever reads this, of what you mean to me. I live for you, I would die for you, and I like that I get to spend forever with you. I like your names. Jesus. Emmanuel. Wonderful Counselor. Prince of Peace. Savior. Hope of the World. You’ve been with me, you guide me, you give me peace in the midst of all these chaos, and my, o my, you’ve gone and saved me from despair and given me hope.

I wish, I wish that all your sons and daughters would see that you really are all that. And that when we have you, we really do need nothing else. I wish that they would see – yea, even those that have known you and turned their backs on you – that the road back has no conditions. You’re standing at the door looking out into the horizon and wishing that they would just appear – oh, how you will run toward them then and clothe them in that never ending embrace.

I like you. I really do.